... of things my high school students lost in the classroom today.
- A brown notebook
-Car keys
-a green and white iPhone
-A bag of Legos
-A book and book on tape
No. No, I have not seen them.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
Dude..... 4/20.....
So, I'm not yet booked to sub tomorrow but the afternoon is young and there is plenty of time for someone to come down with a wicked case of teacher burn-out. However, digging into the archives, I remember that I did indeed sub on 4/20 my first year out. (For those of you unaware of urbandictionary, 420 is the police code for marijuana and therefore 4/20 is like a pothead's Fourth of July.)
When I did get that call it was for a nice high school- large, but pulling from a good neighborhood. I was filling in for a math teacher. This particular math teacher had a math support class - they came in for one period in the morning and then another period after lunch. Anyways, this one kid, Sage or Forrest or Sequoia or something like that, comes in just REEKING of pot in the second session. Seriously, kid? I'm a teacher. That meant I spent 5 1/2 years in college with other dreamy do-gooders. You can't pull this one over on me.
The high school was so large I didn't know who to call about this one, or even if anyone would care. (I have gotten advised before when in a similar neighborhood to not bust kids for pot because their deep-in-denial parents will make life difficult for you.) So, I did what any other over-worked, under-paid sub would do: I made his little stoned brain hurt.
"Hey! Hey, SageForrestSequoia, let's do some math! Right here [tap tap tap], here's your worksheet. Wannadomath wannadomath wannadomath?!?!"
"Uuuuuummmmmm, I'm not really.... in the mood .... to do math ....."
"Oh come on! MATH IS SO FUN! How could'ya not wannadomath? [Tap tap tap] Problem one, right here, a train leaves Baltimore - Baltimore is awesome, huh - at 11:30 ..."
And on it went for another 45 minutes. I hoped he regretted coming to school stoned. But just to make sure I flagged down a security guard on my free period. "Excuse me, there was a kid in my class who I think was stoned? SageForrestSequoia?" The guard grinned and said, "Oh, I know EXACTLY who you are talking about. I'll go pull him out of class now ..."
When I did get that call it was for a nice high school- large, but pulling from a good neighborhood. I was filling in for a math teacher. This particular math teacher had a math support class - they came in for one period in the morning and then another period after lunch. Anyways, this one kid, Sage or Forrest or Sequoia or something like that, comes in just REEKING of pot in the second session. Seriously, kid? I'm a teacher. That meant I spent 5 1/2 years in college with other dreamy do-gooders. You can't pull this one over on me.
The high school was so large I didn't know who to call about this one, or even if anyone would care. (I have gotten advised before when in a similar neighborhood to not bust kids for pot because their deep-in-denial parents will make life difficult for you.) So, I did what any other over-worked, under-paid sub would do: I made his little stoned brain hurt.
"Hey! Hey, SageForrestSequoia, let's do some math! Right here [tap tap tap], here's your worksheet. Wannadomath wannadomath wannadomath?!?!"
"Uuuuuummmmmm, I'm not really.... in the mood .... to do math ....."
"Oh come on! MATH IS SO FUN! How could'ya not wannadomath? [Tap tap tap] Problem one, right here, a train leaves Baltimore - Baltimore is awesome, huh - at 11:30 ..."
And on it went for another 45 minutes. I hoped he regretted coming to school stoned. But just to make sure I flagged down a security guard on my free period. "Excuse me, there was a kid in my class who I think was stoned? SageForrestSequoia?" The guard grinned and said, "Oh, I know EXACTLY who you are talking about. I'll go pull him out of class now ..."
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
One Day
Two awful movies.
1. Pay It Forward. Oh dear Lord, it's just painful to watch Spacey, Hunt, and the creepy kid in their earnest and fruitless quest for an Oscar.
2. Shark Tale. Everything that is wrong with kids' movies. Cheesy urban lingo: check. Madonna/whore female characters: check. Glossing over really bad life decisions like credit and gambling: check. Sir Mix-a-Lot: check.
Any particular hated movies for you?
1. Pay It Forward. Oh dear Lord, it's just painful to watch Spacey, Hunt, and the creepy kid in their earnest and fruitless quest for an Oscar.
2. Shark Tale. Everything that is wrong with kids' movies. Cheesy urban lingo: check. Madonna/whore female characters: check. Glossing over really bad life decisions like credit and gambling: check. Sir Mix-a-Lot: check.
Any particular hated movies for you?
Monday, April 12, 2010
Special Ed ...
It was actually an elementary art assignment, but this teacher gets 2 groups of exclusively special ed kids on Monday afternoons.
Group one was labeled as "academic" special ed. They were going to watercolor in a fish shape in rainbow order. We started by reviewing the colors of the rainbow. They were really good at listing colors, just not in order. So we chanted them a few times. The next step was actually painting the fish. Even with one adult for every four kids, it was still a challenge to get them to paint a stripe of red, stop, rinse the brush, and wait for the next color. By the end, though, we had about 12 lovely rainbow trout.
Group two was listed as "nursing" special ed. They ranged from full support wheelchairs with "hand on hand" instruction (an adult moves their hand that has the brush or pencil in it) to what seemed to be moderate Down's Syndrome. We glued cotton balls to a paper plate, then added black triangles, rectangles (face and feet) and googly eyes to make sheep. Few of the kids performed all the steps (including putting their name on the work) themselves without adult assistance.
Since I usually teach high school art, I'm used to a variety of abilities in my students. However, the severe disabilities are somewhat unfamiliar to me and always a bit of a ... shock (?) Any special ed teacher or sub stories out there?
Group one was labeled as "academic" special ed. They were going to watercolor in a fish shape in rainbow order. We started by reviewing the colors of the rainbow. They were really good at listing colors, just not in order. So we chanted them a few times. The next step was actually painting the fish. Even with one adult for every four kids, it was still a challenge to get them to paint a stripe of red, stop, rinse the brush, and wait for the next color. By the end, though, we had about 12 lovely rainbow trout.
Group two was listed as "nursing" special ed. They ranged from full support wheelchairs with "hand on hand" instruction (an adult moves their hand that has the brush or pencil in it) to what seemed to be moderate Down's Syndrome. We glued cotton balls to a paper plate, then added black triangles, rectangles (face and feet) and googly eyes to make sheep. Few of the kids performed all the steps (including putting their name on the work) themselves without adult assistance.
Since I usually teach high school art, I'm used to a variety of abilities in my students. However, the severe disabilities are somewhat unfamiliar to me and always a bit of a ... shock (?) Any special ed teacher or sub stories out there?
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Guten Morgen, Mein Kinder!
Taught German class this afternoon!!!
So fun -
A) I got to brush up on and test my German skills
B) At OHS - love those kids
C) Got to watch "Shrek" dubbed in German and a film I hadn't seen, "Advertising Rules" - German with English subtitles. It was really good and I wish I knew how it ended.
So fun -
A) I got to brush up on and test my German skills
B) At OHS - love those kids
C) Got to watch "Shrek" dubbed in German and a film I hadn't seen, "Advertising Rules" - German with English subtitles. It was really good and I wish I knew how it ended.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)